Second Stage: Slavery (Exodus 2:23)

Theme: The LORD hears your cry.

The people of God groaned and cried out because of their slavery in Egypt. As their cry for release went up to God, he heard their groaning and was mindful of his covenant with the Fathers.

Let us meditate on the time when God was not a priority in our lives; how we lived in slavery:  Slavery to our passions, selfishness, bad habits, addictions, loneliness, desperation, depression, fears, and needs.

At the end, we groaned and cried out because of our slavery. Our cry went up to God and God heard our cry for help.

Let us pray for all who suffer in slavery, for those bound by difficulties and sins, so that they might come back and take refuge in God and cry out to him from the depths of their hearts.  He is the only one who can free them.


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For Spiritual Direction

This stage goes from the moment you place the world and its passions as a priority to God to the moment when you cry out to God.

 The length of this stage depends from one person to the other. Some people experience Egypt in 5 years. Others experienced it for ten or twenty years. Others die in this period. They die in their sins. All people experience the end of “Egypt” stage at the moment they cry out to God.

 In this stage, you follow your own way. God is no more a priority.

  

You experience oppression from every side:

 Behavior:

 - Drinking alcohol, purging, self mutilation, cutting self, one night stands, out to bars, suicidal thoughts, perfectionist, anti-depressant, emotional problems, touching minors, abusing pills, deep depression, gaining weight, cried all the time.

 - shy, no friends, always alone, to the extreme, passive, non assertive, rules, scrupulosity.

 - drugs, alcohol, parties, promiscuity with more than 15 men, marijuana, pot, crack, heroine, cocaine, crystal tea.

 - masturbation, molested, boyfriend, girlfriend, homosexuality, boy’s touch, sexual abuse, voyeurism, exhibitionism, pornography, fantasies to see girls naked, lost virginity, goes out with people kissing, sex with friends, sexually active, abused by therapist, abused by clergy, abused by counselor, abused by father, abused by neighbor.

 - gambling, rebellion, God is no more priority, anger, conflicts with authority, rejecting rules, left the Church, stealing, loss of someone, follow own ways, thoughts, earthly desires, away from the Church, divorce, beaten up by friends, no faith, rape, addictions, bad habits, loneliness, money, hatred, seduction, cheating, pleasure, having an affair with a married man, oppressed by sin, attached to someone, nothing means to you, no purpose, poverty, nightmares, tensions with people, bad music.

 - birth control, contraception, no intimacy with husband, abortion, sexually transmitted disease, prostitutes, prostitution, dated.

 - hanging around the wrong crowd, fantasies of revenge/self glory/power.

 - shoplifting, pleaser to people, stole money

 - cheating in school, smoking, it was cool

 - conflict between father’s values & his own sexuality, tried to obey all rules, hit the father/mother, verbal fights with a parent.

 - rebellious at father, immature, angry, I was smart not getting caught, “that’s what everyone did”.

 - confused: what to do? who am I? what purpose?

 - life terrible at home, attacked by someone, I was king: I had an apartment, money, women,...

 - physically abused, no job, not ready to sober up.

 - no meaning in life, peer pressure to fight back, moving to a different town.

 - sterilized.

 - lived outside house, kicked out of the house, didn’t know where to go

 - physical problems, a lot of pain

 - loss of a father/mother/aunt, uncle.

 - drugs helped to forget the pain

 - looking for a father figure to make him powerful, to enhance his sexual identity

 - a man touched him saying, “this is gonna help you in your sexual life.

 - from model conservative to model liberal (extremes)

 - I would tell people to follow rules

 - I was the one to pick on, beaten up by friends.

 Wants:

 - I don’t want to do anything wrong, I want to be good. If I do something wrong they wouldn’t love me.

 - I want to take all the bad qualities of the parents.

 - I needed to protect myself

 - I didn’t want them to discover who I was because of the problems I had

 -I want manhood, to be a man, wanted men to accept me

 - I want to please myself

 Feels:

 - felt God was punishing me

 - felt broken

 - felt betrayed, emptiness, void, dirty, spiritually dying, bankrupt, nothing makes sense, boring

 - felt presence of evil so I started to read the Bible

 - felt I was fat, loneliness, alienated

 - felt pity for the abuser so he touched him.

 Fears:

 - fear of rejection, fear wanting to defend self, fears of being a loser, fear of being homosexual, fear of not functioning as a father or uncle, afraid to ask people what they mean, afraid to confront the reality that my inner garden was burnt.

 God:

 - scrupulosity: “Am I sinning or not?”

 - lost faith, atheist, agnostic

 - “religious are superstitious.”

 - she started reaching out to God

 - how do you explain existence? sacrificial love?

 - only the priest can help me. I tried everything. I need a priest.

 - why not uplifted rather than down?

 - not connected with God, quit going to Church completely, mad at God: “I don’t believe in you anymore.”

 - “God you have to help me.”

 - looking for a miracle, where is it?

 - God is not going to do anything to me.

 Voices:

 - “you weren’t planned, that was a mistake.”

 - I can never make it in the world.

 - I can never be successful.

 - “Why are you Christian?”

 - nightmares (clean kill, sniper, moving bodies.

 Relationships:

 - tension with people, she pounds on his chest, he grabs her.

 - love from one side

 - couldn’t reach my father’s standard

 - couldn’t let people come into my life. I was distant.

 - huge wall between me & him/her, no communication.

 - absolute relief & delight

 - I can hurt them by cheating before they hurt me (I was in control).

 Dreams:

 - wanting to break the wall without hurting myself.

 What kind of memories do you have?

 - Positive: desires, dreams, events, good voices...

 - Negative: Abuse, peer pressure, conflicts, loss, shocking events, nightmares, bad voices, stealing, made fun of, illness, fears, surgery, masturbation, move, angry with father...

Voices from Egypt:

 You are unworthy, You are dirty, you are a failure

 What was your goal?

 - success, pleasure, fame

 Bad experiences:

 - being hit by someone, being abused by someone, learned bad habits from someone, stealing, fight with someone, war, moving from one place to another, natural disaster (hurricane or tornadoes), sickness, loss of a parent, relative, friend

Fears & Dreams:

 - fear of death, fear of losing a parent, fear of being abandoned.

In order to get out of this stage,

 1- you need to hit the bottom:

    Depression,

    Sickness,

    breaking up relationship,

    tired,

    empty,

    questions without answers,

    jail,

    divorce

    incident

 2- you need to hear something about Jesus that strikes you:

 - from TV

 - from radio

 - from Internet

 - from a friend

 - from a relative

 - from a priest

 Why don’t you ask the Lord?

 why don’t you go to Church?

 Jesus is your Savior

 3- you need to cry out to God:  

 - Lord, you got to help me.

 - Jesus help me

 - If you are alive, save me.

 - I hit the bottom. I need your help.

 - Please, take me out

 - I am scared, help me

 - I am suicidal. I want to reach out to God

 I can’t follow my own way. Guide me Lord

 I have many questions. I need answers Lord.

 I need a miracle. Lord, where are you?

 The crying out at the end of Egypt’s period will lead you to the next stage: “The Burning Bush”.